From 2baba to Wizkid… we imagined 19 Nigerian artistes as secondary school students

Wizkid

VIDEO Wizkid – Sound It

Star boy Wiz is that rude, short guy in your class that school authorities, classmates and everyone else has been forced to love because he always represents and brings back medals for the school from external quiz competitions.

Davido

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Davido’s parents are corporate workaholics who are always too busy to have his time. The result is an intelligent but deviant child constantly getting into trouble in school to get his parents and everyone else’s attention.

Yemi Alade

VIDEO: Yemi Alade – Kissing {Rmx} Ft. Jeff

Yemi Alade is that annoying teacher’s pet that would do anything to please the school authorities including hiding a nameless boyfriend even though he does all of her assignments and shares his lunch money with her everyday.

Olamide

Olamide-vs-don-jazzy

Olamide is the class hustler who somehow found himself in an expensive school his parents can barely afford. He uses his immediate environment to his advantage by making money off selling and buying things from his spoiled rich classmates. This is the guy that will steal your note a few weeks to exams and resell it to you at the peak of your panic, the night before the paper.

Asa

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Asa is that girl teachers compare everyone else with and even though many students never really knew her, they have been convinced of her magnificence. Rumour has it that she was so smart, oyinbo people came to look for her and took her away on scholarship. She comes around to visit every time she’s in Nigeria, but she never stays for too long.

P-Square

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Brothers Peter and Paul are the school’s star athletes who still manage to come out with good grades but are constantly arguing over how to share their lunch money because their elder brother is constantly bullying them for a share, even though he graduated a long time ago.

Tiwa Savage

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The schools beloved head girl and every boy’s dream girl with an unconfirmed sketchy history and a strange boyfriend everybody gossips about behind her back.

Burna Boy

What the hell is on your head Burna?

Burna Boy is the braggart army general’s son who will bring a gun to school just to show his friends what a real gun looks like.

2baba

2face

Mr. Idibia is one of the trifecta of the oldest guys in class (the other two being D’banj and Sound Sultan). He has repeated the same class, so many times even teachers now respect him.

M.I

M.I – The Chairman Cypher + VIDEO

M.I is the clever short boy who figured out how to become popular on campus by simply being cool. He taught all of his friends and family the same trick and now nearly every new student turned cool kid in the school owes him even though they never actually admit it.

D’banj

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D’banj is the backbencher class clown that throws snide remarks at everyone else. He used to be labelled a potential genius until he tried to transfer to a posher school and failed their entrance examination. His grades have never come back up since.

Sound Sultan

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Baba Sultan is the oldest guy in class. He has occasional bursts of youth in him, but mostly he is just hanging with his best friends 2baba and D’banj at the back of the class because he has outgrown everyone else.

 Simi

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Simi is the short, smart girl that seats in front of the class away from all the noise makers. But no matter how far away she seats, she can hear everyone else teasing her.

Falz

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Falz is that guy that plays too much but somehow keeps his grades above sea level.

Blackmagic

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Nobody knows much about Blackmagic except for tales of his legendary elder brother who has now graduated from the school.

Temi Dollface

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Temi Dollface is that unpopular rich girl with a fashion sense she pretends is hers. Nobody understands what she is saying and nobody bothers to.

Seyi Shay

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Seyi Shay is the attention seeker who is always raising her hands to give wrong answers to questions on purpose just so the class can notice her.

Ice Prince

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Mr. Zamani is the wannabe cool kid that never completed his transition. He tries too hard at fitting in but fails at it all the time too.

Iyanya

Iyanya – Baby Daddy

 

Iyanya is the self-acclaimed fine boy class pervert who will grab any opportunity to talk about sex and strange things he can do to the female vagina.

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